Breathing
by Chesca Tipton
Summary: Why does it always seem so hard to breathe when you've lost the one that matters most? KakaSaku YamaSaku


**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto or any of the surrounding characters.

(Just a small warning: This is really, really depressing, but I'm really happy with how it turned out.)

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**Breathing**

Yamato stayed seated next to the young woman lying helpless on the floor. If anyone else were to walk in they might have suspected her dead at first glance, but upon inspection there was a small shallow sound of breathing coming from her dry parted lips. Her eyes remained sealed by the slowly drying tears that were still soaked in her hair and vest.

Sakura's captain had just witnessed her at her worst.

----

When Yamato had received the tragic news he ran to her as fast as the roofs of Konoha could take him. Within a split second of entering the room he caught her in mid fall. Never would he let this pregnant kunoichi hit the ground, no matter the circumstances. He had made a promise to himself to protect her at all cost, even before he was asked by her husband so many months ago.

----

Almost eight months ago now Yamato's sempai had approached him with, what he had believed to be, the most important news to hear in a long while. Kakashi was going to be a father. This was not the first The Copy Ninja's subordinate had heard of their relationship, but that was not quite the same when it came to rest of the populous in the village, of course that changed within a couple of months time.

No one said anything, no matter what they thought. Too many people feared repercussions from both parents, but their happiness was short lived when Kakashi was sent out on a solo mission that should have only taken a few days time, and that was over a month ago now. Pakkun and the rest of Kakashi's nin dogs showed up only an hour ago with the news:

The great Copy Ninja, Hatake Kakashi is now missing in action. The nin's can no longer feel his chakra signal anywhere, which only the Hokage can make a final decision on whether or not to declare death.

"Tenzou…" The pink-haired nurse stirred underneath his fingertips as another silent sob wracked her body.

"Sakura." The wood user looked down at her for a moment longer, slowly stoking her long strawberry colored locks.

"What am I going to do without him?" she breathed, though her voice was so small he almost missed it.

What do you say to a woman as strong as Sakura is who's whole world has crumbled because she lost her husband?

"I don't feel like I know how to breathe without him. What am I going to do? I can't raise our children on my own. They'll never know their father. What am I supposed to tell them?" Another sob raked her body.

The wood user pulled the dry heaving woman into his arms and held her close, smoothing his hand over her hair and back.

"I'll marry you, Sakura. You don't ever have to love me, or make love to me, but I'll marry you and be there for your children. I know I'll never replace him, but I can do my best to fill the void of husband and father."

All he received was more sobs and a sopping shirt.

One night three months after Sakura had given birth to twins, a boy and girl, Yamato was pacing the nursery Kakashi had decorated for her some odd months back with a small pale pink-haired girl in his arms, crying her eyes out. It took a few tries but after a while she calmed down and was back asleep in her surrogate father's arms. Colic was a nightmare that Yamato never hoped of ever reliving with any other child, ever again.

He moved silently to the room just down the hall so as not to wake his kunoichi. She slept so peacefully. It was such a shame that she was never so content looking when awake. The first time they made love she cried first in pain of it not being the man she loved, then in pleasure.

With little effort he crawled into bed just as quiet as ever and Sakura automatically rolled into him' burring her face safely in his chest and wrapping her delicate fingers in his shirt. "Please don't ever leave me, Kakashi…" she mumbled into him.

His fingers stroked her hair as they always did when he was comforting her, "never, ever, my love." He knew that's what Kakashi called her. "I will never leave you."

-----

This had become routine for them. She rarely ever remembered her small insignificant conversations with Yamato in the middle of the night, so he bore the unhappiness of this end for her. The less she had to make her miserable the better. Once the children were old enough to realize that something was amuck between their mother and "father" they would start asking questions, so the sooner Sakura becomes happier with her life and the less there is to remind her of her deceased husband the better.

Night after night passed the same. Sometimes Yamato would take watch over the twins, and other times Sakura felt she was okay to stay watching them.

"Sakura, come to bed, please? It's almost four in the morning and you have an early shift at the hospital today," the wood user begged with a yawn.

"Just a few more minutes and I'll be right there, Tenzou. I promise." She may have directed her words to him, but her focus was all on the boy sleeping soundly in her arms. He was the spitting image of his father. She knew that she would never be able to convince their small minds even this young that Yamato was their real father, but she'd at least try…for them, if not for her own sanity as well.

Minutes had passed, slow and steady after Yamato had gone off to bed, until the open window's moonlight was gone; blocked by could have only been a person standing there. With infant in one arm she reached around and pulled out the kunai she kept hidden just on the underside of the rocking chair.

"Giving birth hasn't changed you one bit. In fact, I think you may be even more radiant now then you were when I was with you last, my love."

The kunai fell from her fingers at the sound of the man's voice, "Kakashi…"she breathed out almost not believing what her senses were telling her in fact was real. "You…you…your…alive."

He limped into the dimness of the room allowing the glow of the moon to penetrate once more. "You've been busy I see."

She ignored his comment, "Where have you been?"

"Dead apparently." He moved toward her his eyes fixed on the bundle in her arms. His fingers reached out and slowly traced the outer curve of the newborn's face.

"I'm just glad that Tenzou kept his promise to me, though we may have some small issues to deal with later. I'm surprised that you didn't wait on marrying him, my love, but all the same, we can deal with that all later."

Kakashi took his son from his wife's arms and placed him delicately back in his crib, safe and sound.

"I promise I'm never leaving again, never ever, my love," he quoted as he had so many times before to her and lifting up his kunoichi he kissed her gently, allowing her to feel his love radiating through his every pore.

-----

Yamato lifted Obito out of his mother's arms and placed him back into his crib then turned to the open window where the wind was blowing in. Soft whispers could be heard in its wisps if you listened closely.

"Let her go, Kakashi. She's suffered enough."

There was a light shadow that moved, as if a man had once been standing there, and to never return.

Yamato turned and closed the window for the last time then picked up his wife and carried her back to bed.

After laying down next to her Yamato watched Pakkun roll over at the foot of their bed and kick the air in his sleep, he then leaned over his wife and gently whispered into her ear, "Sakura, I may not ever love you the way he did, but I can no longer feed into this, for you too must let him go."

Tears rolled down her cheeks through closed eyes as she breathed out, "Goodbye, Kakashi…my love…forever."

Yamato's head hit the pillow and he knew that tomorrow was going to be the start of a new and fresh day, and even maybe, if he was lucky, a fresh start to their new life.

_**End**_


End file.
